Really, one would think that over sixteen and a half years my mother would get used to my randomly bitchy and selfish comments. It isn't exactly something new. I may say awful things sometimes (oh, boy do I!), but 99% of the time I do my best to do the right thing. I really do.
I did say something randomly awful to my mother because I was looking forward to the two movies I had planned to get from Netflix, and my mother wanted a movie, so I was disapointed not to be able to see both. Not that I wouldn't have, and didn't, change my Netflix queue. But my mother, instead of reasonably going "Maren, don't say things like that. That's awful and selfish." she starts saying "Let's see, late fees from Mr. Movies, you spilled tomato soup on the Netflixs (which I was washing off), and now this. It's like three strikes."
I may say mean things, but my mother can out-mean and out-snot me by a long shot. If she had tried to make me feel like a petulant stupid six year old, she couldn't have done better. Not only did she use outlandish "strikes" (the movies overdue in question were my brothers, not mine, and I happen to be a kultz. It's not the worst thing in the world), she laughs. She LAUGHED as she was totally berating me. She never can be serious about diciplining me, never talks to me like a reasonable human being when I screw things up! She and my Dad are always teasing me, but they always make my faults seem like amusement.
Can't my parents ever treat my seriously as a person? I'm so sick of being their personal little side-show. And being teased 24/7.
So, now not only am I feeling selfish and arrogant from school (because really that English brings out the worst in me), but from home too.
I'm sick of feeling like such a cranky and terrible person. Cause I really try my best not to be.